10. After each episode, you do an all-kitty reenactment in your basement
9. You refer to your in-laws as "The Others"
8. While visiting New York, you stood over every manhole and screamed, "Good God -- a secret hatch"
7. You're halfway to your goal of licking every cast member
6. Your friend phoned during "Lost." Next day you beat him to death with a hot poker
5. You pitched NBC a show about 12 people stranded backstage at "Saturday Night Live"
4. Co-workers affectionately refer to you as "That loser who's obsessed with 'Lost'"
3. Renamed dental practice "Flost"
2. Your wife is getting sick of playing the bedroom game "Find the castaway"
1. You sat through all ten of these lame jokes
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